People Treat You How?
by Dave Owen ~ March 27th, 2009. Filed under: Health.
As strange as it may sound, people treat you the way that you have trained them to treat you. You may not believe that this is always true but let’s take a look at your track record.
As a baby, you taught your parents to give you a change of clothes by crying. They learned that you were hungry when you made a lot of noise. You taught them that you liked something by laughing or smiling.
When you got your “other half”, you showed them that you were interested by demonstrating love and effection. If they felt the same, they would “return the feeling”. If they didn’t act the same way as you, you were taught to either switch your behavior or move on to someone else.
You have behaved in this manner all of your life in one way or some other. When someone would be offensive, you’d either take it or not. By sitting there and not sounding out anything, you taught the offender that it was ok. When you’d say something or get up and leave, you taught them that their actions weren’t appropriate.
Quite often this education has taken a lot of time and has been very subtle. It is not all of the time explosive or noisy. It can occasionally be as little as a look or a word or two to complete a lesson.
So, what can you do about all the human relationships that you’ve created that are inappropriate? Well, you can set about to retrain these people. You can start to show them how you really desire to be treated.
Prior to being able to begin an effective training session with others, you will need to learn to treat yourself the way you want. It is not possible to train someone else to treat you better than you treat yourself.
Also, for a lot of us, we would not let our friends treat us as bad as we treat ourselves.
For some people, this task will not be very difficult. But, for others, it will take a lot more effort to learn that you want to be treated differently.
When you get into a situation with one of your ’students’, think about how you want to be treated. If this is not happening, set about to instruct them. If someone is being abusive, you do not have to accept this action, you can walk out of the room. If someone is too “in your face”, you can place your hand on their chest and establish the amount of space you need.
By taking control of how you train others to treat you, you can begin to increase how happy you are with your actions.
